Mission Impossible: The Final Reckoning Review

A.I. is trying to take over the world, and it’s up to Ethan Hunt and his Mission Impossible team to save the day… one last time. 💥😎

Let me start with the best things: there are two action scenes, 1. an underwater submarine scuba heist, and 2. A World War One plane fight in the style of Top Gun Maverick meets Buster Keaton-esque air gymnastics that are super impressive and some of the best practical set pieces I’ve seen in a very long time, maybe ever. Tom Cruise is like the Christopher Nolan/Daniel Day-Lewis of action scenes; his commitment to realism and giving every action and acting scene his all, not to mention working in some good physical humor and gags into some of these deifying stunts, is SUPER impressive. You can tell he has a lot of love and respect for his character and this franchise.

Also, loved all the scenes with Tom Cruise, Simon Pegg, and Ving Rhames. All three actors have great chemistry and banter, with each actor given a moment to shine, and honestly the real heart of this movie is the friendship between these characters, which I really enjoyed.

Unfortunately, this movie is about an hour and 10 to 20 minutes too long, and when it drags, it drags harder than RuPaul in a Pride Parade.

First off, this movie has WAY too many characters; like, almost every scene has 3 to 5 characters too many. And it’s kind of disappointing because Christopher McQuarrie hires recognizable actors for almost every minor role, and he knows how to get good performances out of them, but so many of them are perfunctory. Like there’s this whole sub plot with the president and her cabinet that I really enjoyed, but honestly it should’ve been cut or made into its own separate movie because it really messes with the pacing.

I did like Haley Atwell quite a bit; she brought a lot of fun and cheeky charisma to her character. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much for her to do, but the actress made the most of it, and that is commendable. The same goes for Pom Klementieff & Katy O'Brian; it was nice seeing them, but it would’ve been nicer if they had anything to do, and honestly could have been cut.

This being the “final film,” they try and tie previous films into this one to make it feel like a BIG finale, and you can clearly tell that they are stretching, like the new Reed Richards Fantastic Four movie he’s going to have to do some. John Wick-style stretching kung fu tops this movie's stretches.

For example, besides Angela Bassett, they bring back two characters, and without going into too much detail… The Henry Czerny (Ethan’s former boss) stuff was fine because I like that actor and his chemistry with Tom Cruise, and while I like seeing Rolf Saxon again, he was in the movie for way too long and would’ve worked better as a fun cameo (like Val Kilmer in Top Gun: Maverick). And that stuff they tried to do with Shea Whigham—again, I love that actor—but it’s like putting on pants that are too small… It was too much of a stretch and REALLY did not need to be in the film because there’s too much going on, and I get them trying to connect everything and make this finale feel grand, but it’s like overeating on Thanksgiving; it’s starting to hurt the experience.

The worst is this character played by Greg Tarzan Davis. All this character has to do is stand in the background and say a couple of lines every once in a while, but he’s like in so many scenes, and I just kept thinking… There is no reason for you to be here. Like, the actor is good, and he’s trying his best, but it’s like using your fist to make a rock into a diamond, like… He got nothing and really shouldn’t be there at all.

I will say I did quite enjoy the sub-plot with the president and her cabinet, all that felt like a well-made sendup/remake of the 60s film Crossfire, but it mostly felt like a completely separate movie half the time and should’ve been made its own film and cut from this one.

Also, and this is a light spoiler, but it’s more spoiling something that doesn’t happen… Rebecca Ferguson doesn’t come back. I really thought they had faked her character’s death, and unfortunately, she’s really dead, which I’m not the biggest fan of that choice because I liked her character and what she brought to the series, and you could kind of feel something missing in this movie because of it.

The villains are pretty bad… First of all, A.I. has all the subtlety and creativity of Cobra Commander meets a lame Yu-Gi-Oh!/Terminator rip-off you’d see in a Sci-Fi Channel original movie. And Esai Morales gives the part his all, and while I liked the actor, so much of his dialogue and plot was convoluted and ridiculous, not to mention all he does is just stand around, sneer, drop exposition, and do over-the-top villain monologues until the very fight, and in his last scene he becomes an over-the-top villain like Snively Whiplash. How have I seen more nuance to villains in a random Futurama episode than in this $300-$400 million movie?

Also, there’s this whole subplot about people starting to worship the A.I. as, like, a messianic figure and wanting to serve it that you set up but really has no impact on the overall story, like at all, so it’s like, why was that included?

Oh my God, there were so many flashbacks, like 20 minutes of flashbacks, and not just from the previous films but also from the things you saw like 10 minutes ago. Like, I hadn’t forgotten that yet. Why are you showing me this? Not to mention this other plot about other governments trying to steal the AI to control it, and it’s like, guys, I’m sorry, but this is TOO much. Like, you’re making me mentally constipated with all these plots.

Also, 65% of the dialogue in this film feels like exposition dumps, and you have so many shots of people just standing around on what look like green screens while they just keep between all these different characters, talking and reacting and it gets so boring and repetitive so quickly, like for a three hour action movie there is a surprisingly little amount of action, and while they make it count when it shows up, it’s not enough to justify this runtime like honestly the best way to watch this movie is to go, sleep through a lot of the talkie bits and then just have someone wake you up when action starts, like I know that doesn’t sound good at all but so much of this script feels like a bad sci-fi channel original movie knock off.

There is also something they do that I really did not care for, but it’s a big spoiler, so if you want to know what I’m talking about and you’ve seen the movie already… Jump to the ending after the rating to see what I’m talking about.

Now I will say this movie has some of the most stunning and creative shots of the whole franchise, which is frustrating because it also has some of the weakest and most boring shots in the franchise, so it’s a very mixed bag experience as far as the filmmaking, but when the director is on, he is super on, so glad he got to make some cool shots.

Now, all that being said, you can really tell that Christopher McQuarrie and Tom Cruise have a real love and dedication to spectacle.

blockbuster filmmaking, and what they were able to accomplish in that area of this film was quite commendable, so I give props to them there. 👏👏👏👏

And finally, this movie has not only one of the funniest character-in-pain screams. I’ve heard in a superduper long time, but also one of the funniest deaths for a character, like I know I shouldn’t have laughed, but I did both times, so that was unintentionally hilarious.

So to summarize, this movie is very much a mixed bag, and unfortunately more nays than yays. It’s a case of too many ideas and plots put into one film that feel they were Frankensteined together in editing to make a very uneven but enjoyable in parts (depending on your fandom of this series) type experience. And while I did really enjoy the two big action set pieces, some character moments, and the sendoff to Tom Cruise and this version of the Mission Impossible franchise, I don’t know if regular audiences who aren’t in on all the different references won’t get frustrated at the movie’s runtime. So

Unfortunately, I give the film two stars⭐️⭐️. It for sure had its moments that I want to praise and had a good time with, but too much baggage to go with it.

💥💥💥!!!SPOILER TIME!!!💥💥💥

Man, I am so bummed they killed off Luther. I love his character in these movies and his trio friendship with Simon Pegg and Tom Cruise. His character got a really sweet sendoff, and Ving Rhames does an amazing and heartfelt acting performance. In a way, he’s kind of the heart of this film, but I wish he hadn’t died just because I like his character so much.

This review will self-destruct in five seconds… 📞💥😎

Final Destination: Bloodlines 💀🩸

 

A young woman discovers her family is being hunted by death because of something her grandma did in the 1960s.

I have to say they really got creative with the Rube Goldberg deaths in this one, like the filmmakers were really creative and intuitive when it came to pacing out the suspense and giving you a very satisfying and memorably gory death, like you will be going “ooooooh” at least once.

Speaking of characters, that’s another strong plus of this movie. All of the main characters were likable, and the actors gave really compelling and interesting performances. Even at the beginning, I thought one or two might be underdeveloped and just kind of there for the body count, but by the end, you also ended up liking every family member and hoping they survived.

Usually, I try and call out performances I thought were really good and stood out, but I think everyone in the cast did a very good job and gave very entertaining and engrossing performances, so… Just go look at the cast list to see who did a good job. I will say my favorite character was Erik. He was really funny and sarcastic, which I always like, plus the actor was very charming, so I think he’ll be everyone’s favorite character.

Plus, the main actress (Kaitlyn Santa Juana) did a great job at portraying intense “crazy” eyes… If you see the movie, you know what I mean, lol

Also, this had one of the most satisfying character deaths I’ve seen in a while… When you see the movie, you don’t know exactly who I’m talking About… I shouldn't have clapped, but I did 👏😂

I also quite enjoyed the directing in the movie; there were a lot of cool Sam Raimi-type Dutch angles, which I always dig.

Similar to Alien: Romulus, there is a little bit of a “greatest hits” feel with this movie, like there are some definite callbacks to previous films; for example, some plot points and scenarios felt similar to previous films, but it was never lazy or felt forced. They felt natural to the story and well written, not to mention. If you’re a fan of this series , you’ll definitely have a few moments when you’ll be like, “Oh, that’s on this entry or that one,” without it feeling pandering.

Also, VERY, VERY LIGHT SPOILER… I like how they used more of the psychic powers in this universe.

Sadly, this is the last film of Tony Todd, but he gave the part his all, and for the amount of screen time he had, he was great. As always, he was good, but his final scene was a great sendoff to a fantastic actor and dude. Rest in peace, Tony. Thanks for all the great work and memories .

I was a little worried about the gore at first, just because a good amount of the effects are CGI.

and those can feel artificial compared to practical effects at times… Not here, though. Maybe the effects team used practical effects and then used CGI to enhance them; maybe it was just $50 million that made some really good effects, but those deaths definitely fit with the rest of the series, and we’re just as brutal.

This is a small thing for me, but… The other films used a lot of Canadian actors and locations, and it was the same here, so I appreciated that because it helped make the series feel “on brand.”

The cinematographer did an excellent job. The lighting was definitely stylized, but not overly so; you could tell it just took what lights were naturally there and just used them in specific ways to heighten the look and feel of everything, which was very smart and well done.

The plot had some good twists and turns, and the story had no real fat on it; everything unfolded naturally and was entertaining and well paced. It’s like a fun ride. This thing starts and it keeps going until the end, and if you’re into it, you’re going to have a really fun time.

So I was a little nervous walking into this movie. I mean, it’s been so long since the last one, and bringing back a dormant franchise can be very hit or miss, and since this is one I grew up on and really enjoyed, I was worried this one just wouldn’t hold up … Luckily, you can tell everyone was very passionate and excited to work on this film and had a lot of creative and interesting takes on the story, and they made a really entertaining and fun movie that I was surprised how much I got into and enjoyed… In general, I would say this is a four-star movie, but since I’m a fan of this franchise and I had a lot of fun watching it, it pushes my rating slightly over to a low five “stars” 💀💀💀💀💀. I will say my nostalgia and sick sense of humor might be clouding my judgment, but when you have a good time, you have a good time, so you might as well enjoy it. 💀🩸👍

Clown in a Cornfield Review 🤡🌽

 

So I walked into this movie having not seen a trailer, not knowing much about what it was about except it was from the director of Tucker and Dale vs. Evil, and I could probably expect to see a clown and a cornfield in this movie, spoilers… they were there, lol.

The basic plot is a father and daughter move to a small town, and homicidal jester shenanigans ensue… basically the slasher was clowning around 🤡🌽😂

I really liked the scenes that explore the father-daughter relationship; both actors are really talented, charismatic, and likable and add a lot of heart to the movie.

I think the whole cast does a good job and each character has a moment to shine, I especially like seeing Will Sasso in this, he’s a comedian I’ve always loved and it’s just always nice to see him pop up and things.

OK, so I wasn’t really digging the first half of the movie; it wasn’t necessarily bad, it was just very “Dawson Creek, adults just don’t understand us young people and our problems” melodrama that, honestly, I could not have cared less about. I mean, clearly this movie is made for teenagers and… I am not one, so I really couldn’t get into the teen melodrama of the film, of which there is a lot. I will say the actors in the film are pretty good; the dialogue and tone are just too “YA novel” for my taste.

There are some pretty good kills in the movie that actually balance the gore, humor, and suspense pretty well, and the filmmaker knows how to pace the kills so they fit the tone well.

So I said I didn’t like the first half, but in the second half, they lean more into that subversive comedy and have more twists, and this is when I really got Tucker & Dale vibes in a good way. I had some pretty good laughs and enjoyed the story at this point, like all the twists and turns and performances and atmosphere—it all really worked for me. It was really enjoyable.

The climax was a little hit or miss; there are parts I liked, and some parts felt a bit much and melodramatic… Still some good twists and good use of humor and performances, but it leaned back on the YA tropes, and it just wasn’t for me. Plus, it felt like they were running out of time and money to make it, so they had to, like, hurry up and end it, so there were some dangling things. I wish they had a more satisfying conclusion too.

Frendo, is it OK, slasher? Nothing too special, and I can’t say he’s the most memorable horror icon, but he was satisfactory; he got stuff done, but I don’t know if I’ll be seeing a lot of Frendo Halloween costumes this year.

I’m a sucker for a movie that has good-looking women covered in blood and killing things, so… This movie definitely delivered there.

The movie was short and to the point and had good pacing… That may sound like a backhanded compliment. I mean it in a very complimentary way; this thing moved at a nice, breezy, enjoyable pace.

So I wouldn’t say horror fans need to rush out and see this movie, but if you’re looking for, like, a horror comedy on a lazy day and you really have nothing to watch and you want something new, you’ll get some good laughs and chuckles and kills out of this, so if you are interested, I would say I think you would get some fun stuff out of it, but don’t expect the next Terrifier; you’ll probably watch it, have some good times, and then move on, which isn’t a bad thing.

I give the movie somewhere between a high two stars and a low three stars: ⭐️⭐️ or ⭐️⭐️⭐️ 

Thunderbolts* Review

 

A bunch of misfit assassins must work together to stop a government conspiracy and just might have to save the world from a ginormous threat… But can they stop the bad guy before killing each other?

I will start with one complaint… There is a character in this that I was hoping they would do more with, and they do not, and I feel like it was a bit of a waste to include this character because I was hoping for more with them… But they didn’t, so that’s a bit of a bummer.

Florence Pugh is very funny, charismatic, likable, and has some fun action scenes in the movie.

My biggest concern was I hope they nailed the characters of John Walker and Bob, just because I find them the most interesting characters… Not only did they, but there are some of my new favorite MCU characters, so that’s nice and impressive.

Always good to see Sebastian Stan; he’s a good straight man to everyone else’s wildness, but he gets some good funny moments too and fits in this crew.

I was pleasantly surprised by Red Guardian. He clearly is a big “comic relief” character… both figuratively and literally lol, and while that’s fun, I worried his character would be too jokey and just be too one note… But they actually gave him some pretty good material and actually some genuine sweet moments, which is great because David Harbor is a great actor, and he’s wonderful in those scenes.

Hannah John-Kamen & Olga Kurylenko may have smaller roles in the film, but they’re still very enjoyable and make the most of the time they have on screen.

Julia Louis-Dreyfus makes for a fun, interesting, and humorous villain who can be both charmingly charismatic and funny at throwing shade at characters.

Geraldine Viswanathan is a fun actress who does a good job in her part. I just wish the character had been written a little stronger and had a little bit more to do within the story, and her final resolution felt a bit rushed. Despite some shortcomings, her character is fine within the context of the movie; I just wish there was a little bit more to her given how much attention she’s given.

Wendell Pierce has a fun supporting role in this; I wish there was a stronger payoff to his character, but the actor was very fun and humorous, and I look forward to seeing him in the new Superman movie this year.

I’m quite a stickler when it comes to villains in superhero movies; I just see too many missed opportunities… But the two bad guys were actually pretty interesting and enjoyable while also being distinct from one another.

Overall, I quite enjoyed the characters in this, both as individuals and as a unit. Some characters are more fleshed out than others, but every character has a moment to shine and a good emotional beat/insight to their character.

There are a few things that are references to previous MCU material, and while I think even if you haven’t kept up with every single movie and TV show in the MCU, you’d still be able to follow it, I’d be interested to see if this movie is as enjoyable to someone who goes in with a more vague knowledge of things.

I love the color grading in this; the mix of bright whites and yellows and dark blues and earth tones is really stunning.

The fights are good, all solid and enjoyable, but there was one at the beginning that involved shadows and a big “superhero type” battle towards the end that, without spoiling… I thought it was really cool. I also enjoyed how personal and character-driven the climax got for everyone. I don’t know if this is like the most memorable action movie of the year or MCU in general, but it is a solid and enjoyable one, so free action fans, you’ll get some good moments out of this.

The movie was very good, staying on its theme and having little visual and somatic clues and reoccurring dialogue that really played well into that.

I like the climax’s resolution. I mean, it does have a cliché I’m not the biggest fan of, but within the context of the story, it works well. Also, the ending set some interesting stuff up that I’m really excited for, and the biggest compliment I can give this movie is… I can’t wait to see what happens to these characters next.

This statement is not going to make any sense unless you’ve seen the movie, but I just had to mention it, so very light SPOILERS, but… Meth chicken, wow lol.

I also like the post-credit scene because it does the best of both expands on the ending and also does a good job at teasing the next film.

Thunderbolts* is like if Zack Snyder directed Guardians of the Galaxy, but James Gunn still wrote it. Throw in a little The Boys political intrigue and a dash of Doom Patrol superhero therapy, and you get Thunderbolt*, which not only balances all these different tones mostly well but is genuinely funny in parts with cool action scenes that work naturally into the themes of the film. I also appreciate the crap that went into the filmmaking and the balance between real-world and high-concept comic book ideas and visuals while still standing grounded and emotional… I really dug it.

Sure, not every character gets as well developed as I would hope, some of the pacing can be off, and this movie definitely reminds you of other superhero films, but my overall number of issues does not affect the overall piece too much; it’s mostly a lot of fun and interesting and has some of my favorite MCU moments alongside some of my new favorite MCU characters, so I tip my hat to you, Thunderbolts.* 🎩👌

I give this somewhere between a high four stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ and low five stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️.